What does vaping make you feel like?

I’ve been a cigarette smoker for more than half of my life. More specifically, a menthol cigarette smoker. A Newport smoker.

Pack of 20 Newport's - Menthol Cigarette's
Pack Of Newport’s – Menthol Cigarettes

When I was 22 years old, I had a little bit of my freedom taken away for about 3 weeks. Where I was, I could still smoke, but not on my own time.

I couldn’t smoke whenever I felt like smoking, but only when it was announced… ” SMOKE BREAK!!! SMOKE BREAAAK COME GET YA SMOKE BREAK! TIME FOR FRESH AIR!!! ”


At that point- one cigarette, a short- was just not enough.. it just didn’t do it for me. So, I switched to Newport 100s. This way, I could smoke 1 whole cigarette, plus a half of a cigarette & save the other half for next time. ( or give it away to someone without any.)

I thought for sure this change would be temporary. That when I got home, I’d go right back to smoking shorts. I wouldn’t need all that cigarette when I could smoke on my time. Whenever I wanted to smoke.


That wasn’t the case. Instead, I continued smoking Newport 100s. The excuse I used now?? “It’s easier to Split a cigarette with someone…”

Well, true true, Fair Point. It worked well when I hung out with other smokers. My live-in-BoyFriend also smoked Newport’s and we felt like splitting the 100s made us smoke less!!! THE LOGIC!!

I mean everyone we talked to, e v e r y o n e we hung out with always wanted us to “Split a cigawette wisss me pls?” (a joke for another day)


There were a few times in between then and now, that I actually quit smoking all together.

Those times, I used the Nicotine Patches to quit.

img source target.com

The most successful time I used the patches, I stayed on Step One, 21MG’s, for about 2.5-3 months. It was Christmas-time & I had a lot going on at the time. My doctor was very much monitoring me with monthly appointments.

Somewhere in between the third and fourth month of Step One, (January), I felt as though I was finally ready to step down to a 14MG Patch, Step 2. During the transition, 4 of 5 times, there was a period of, 2 maybe 3 days that I had forgotten to change my patch all together. So when the time came to step down, I put on the 14MG patch and within a few shorts hours I was so sick.

Clammy palms, sweaty armpits, pounding headache with an emphasis on light sensitivity and nausea.

Forgetting to switch my patch for multiple days, multiple times, had lowered nicotine tolerance significantly.

After taking a few hour break without any patches on, I stepped down even lower, to Step 3, 7MG’s.

It didn’t make me sweat, or give me a headache, but the nausea was sticking to my insides like you’d think a giant wad of swallowed Bazooka Bubble Gum would do. Bazooka (chewing gum) - Wikipedia [Click image for Bazooka Bubble Gum Song by ScouterMom. com!]

A few short hours and a nice hot shower later – I could officially say I quit smoking. It felt great to say and so did I.


Two and a half years later, while celebrating my “Dirty 30” at a bar in Patriot’s Place with a ‘good friend‘ of mine, we got a little buzzed and bummed a few cigarettes. None of which were Newports.

We Craved that cooling Menthol sensation that feels so much like relief.


So, on the way back to her house, she bought us a pack of shorts, and we vowed to toss them out the window on the ride home.

We were rationalizing ….. We both preferred to smoke 100s, so it’s not like we’d really want them afterwards.

They were shorts, so we weren’t smoking as much.

It was my birthday, I deserved to do what I wanted to.

I hadn’t had a cigarette in 2.5 years, I wouldn’t throw that all away in one night… Right?

Happy Birthday To Me.

I did not throw that pack out the window on the ride home that night.

I told myself I was not going to litter just to get them away from me. No, I’d throw them in the first dumpster I saw. More rationalizing on my part.

Still, I didn’t.

I smoked three that night and held onto the pack for over a week. After they were gone, I picked right back up.



Maybe just as stupid as my most recent attempt at “quitting“. See I tried to stay the course I knew, and use the Patch again, but I continued to smoke- and you cannot do both.

This time, Newports and all menthol cigarettes had been completely banned from the State that I live in. Flavors were completely banned. I’d have to drive an hour or more to get the cigarettes I smoked.

This time, I picked up something new. Something I’ve pretty much always been against.

Something that has been turned into ‘the trendy way to smoke.’

Appealing to the budding minds of our youth.

Our children.

The Future.

There are risks, we just don’t know about them all, not yet.


I thought that by using a Puff Bar, more Specifically, an ESCO BAR whenever I craved a cigarette, than I was on the path to quitting.

I thought that with every craving I had, Every puff that I took, I was one step closer to being a retired smoker.

Instead, I was using just another form of replacement therapy.

The flavors were wide and filled with taste. Colorful even. So hard to choose.

Now – I use this…

SMOK’s Nord 4. It’s a small enough vape “bar” with a removable tank to add in nicotine flavors. The difference between this and an Esco Bar, is that this can be refilled as needed, buttt also, everyone so often the coil needs to be changed out. How do you know when to change it?? Oh you’ll know.

The bitter/bad coil taste has quite a wide variety of grotesque tastes. When you know- You know.

I thought this was not as bad as smoking cigarettes, and, while it might not be as bad as sucking down 20 Newport 100’s per day – It still feels like its pretty frikkin bad!! I’ll tell you a little about what I feel.

See usually when I quit smoking, I feel it in my lungs pretty shortly after quitting. I feel like breathing becomes easier, lighter even.

With vaping, I’ve not felt my breathing get lighter by any means, maybe slightly easier, cleaner, but not lighter.

I don’t stink like stale cigarette smoke anymore *hooray!!* and my mouth doesn’t taste like an old dirty ashtray, but are my lungs greasy now?? Oil and water do not mix, so is the oil sitting on the fluid of my lungs? It sort of feels like this is what that would feel like. hmm.

There are days where I feel like I’m puffing on a computer – Like I’m puffing electricity… if that were a thing…

The dull ache in the back of my throat that connects in my head, leads me to believe it has something to do with my vaping… but what do I know?

My breath sometimes feels heavy, too heavy. Like taking a great big inhale just won’t work because it’s too heavy, or something is in the way.

This isn’t an every time thing, however it is a thing. Is it due to vaping? I can’t say, but there are times where I feel like I know my body so well, that I know something is going on in there…

I’d need to do a lot more research on the effects of vaping to really know any answers, but today I just wanted to share my thoughts about my vaping with you. Have something you’d like to add or say about vaping or smoking?

We’d love to hear you Share in the comments!!

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Who is it that keeps us going?

The rock.

The stone.

The glue that keeps the pieces together.

The beds would not be made,

Homework would not be done,

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Teeth would not be brushed, faces left unclean & eyes would never leave the screens.

Dishes might be done, but not put away-

Dinner would be made, but sit out for days and days.

Laundry might be clean, but not folded nor put in it’s right places…

If mom wasn’t here – there’s be so many empty spaces.

Coats and sheets would stay dirty,

So would the floors.

Never mind the shower- the toilet bowl would be a horror.

Love would still be given,

Love would still be felt,

But questions would be ignored & everything would melt…

Books would go unread and maybe things would go unsaid –

Like Mama keeps every household going – even when she’s no longer glowing.

The ‘no’ memories …

Ever think of a memory… and while your thinking of it…. Your thinking, or saying out loud …, “ no, no, noopee…” ?

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It can’t only be me.

Are those the bad memories?? The ones our brains want us to forget altogether. The ones we do usually end up forgetting altogether .

It’s like, even though it’s running through my head, maybe even … call it a flashback…. I do not want to think about it now or ever again.

I never really thought of it that way.

But thank you brain, for healing my heart ❣️

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    A thought for the day that I’m struggling with, that I’ve never looked at afar, from FmomB.. xO.

    If I kept track of every time I thought about someone…

    Saturday August 21, 2021

    10:56pm Sitting outside on my “stoop” aka … farmers… porch 🤣😂 – the air changes… the breeze feels stuffy, and all of a sudden it’s not.

    I think of you…

    I can’t tell you exactly why- it was just like one second you were there, the next you weren’t.

    At first an indoor affair came to mind, something that happened in my adult years. Seconds later, a line or 2 into the song, you come to mind. Not the last version of you I saw. The high school, awkward, 8th grade you. Maybe this was a song we listened to together with friends or maybe on one of our blunt cruises..

    Next up @ a little past 11pm, still on the same stoop..

    I think of you

    Not because this song has any consensual significance … but because I’ll never forget you rapping it… https://music.amazon.com/albums/B07V1PSR43?do=play&trackAsin=B07V49TMTN&ref=dm_sh_xxNipT4CFBBOnYFYIt0rHIb8gholy shit… is that The significance??? Is this the same “bands” song from while we were playing drinking games as kids ?

    No. I’m wrong.

    But at 11:19 …

    “ girl run. Run like a track star if mooski ain’t say it better “ – I know booboo , I know coR. & I thank you

    Or you’d say something like… ‘ ain’t ni key say it as good as so and so in his last and only hit wonder let me tell you.”

    Let me tell you.

    A boogie wit a hoodie said it correct when he said “There will never be another you

    Always ALWAYS. Mentioning red light special , marvins room, confessions ( let’s say usher period)

    “ cuz… let me tell you a little something about MY life a boogie wit a hoodie…

    Off the Beaten Path


    I’m currently watching “Death Of Me” On ; ‘Netflix’. It’s pretty f$#k-y to say the least. ” Island Magic” “Nam mun prai” This shit is crazy!!

    Finished up “Glitch” and Netflix suggested I watch this. Almost as gruesome, if not more, as “The Cell” from 2000. The guts, intestines. Pulling.. squirming. cracking… ugh. Ya know what though? Her braid somehow manages to stay fucking perfect throughout. Well… I’m currently exactly 1 hour, 15 minutes and 9 seconds in… and her braid is completely perfect.

    I should be playing with one of my many children. I’m going to miss it. I’m in it and I’m missing it. I’m not doing anything to change it.

    Wow. WTAF did I just watch? I can’t even with this.

    Go watch it, right now. Go ahead. It’s fuckey for sure, but in like, a good, interesting way.

    Here, let me give you ANOTHER SPOILER ALERT.... JUST INCASE – I SPOIL.


    Now, Netflix has suggested that I watch “Can’t Cope Won’t Cope” , and….WHOA!! It was actually more of a forceful suggestion, nevertheless. It started playing it for me like… almost immediately after friggin ‘Death of me’ , talk about 1 extreme to the next!! Ah I’m all over the place here!

    So, just to double back real quick, I’m talking about 3 different shows/movie’s streamed on Netflix;

    1. Glitch Series
    2. Death of me
    3. Cant cope won’t cope

    So, if you’ve not seen any of the 3, I suggest you exit this article now!

    Glitch (TV Series 2015–2019) - IMDb

    Glitch ( 3 seasons, 18 total episodes) is an Australian television programme which premiered on 9 July 2015 on ABC ( Later onto Netflix) . The series is set in the fictional country town of Yoorana, Victoria, and follows 7 people whom are originally from there, and died there, who return from the dead in perfect health but with no memory.

    Death of Me (2020) - IMDb

    Death of Me is a 2020 Film. As I stated, gruesome, nasty, violent, yet satisfying.

    Vacationing on an island off the coast of Thailand, couple Neil and Christine awake hungover.. and with absolutely no recollection of the previous night. When trying to board the Ferry to get home, they realize that at least one of them is missing their wallets, phone, money, and neither of them can find their passports, therefore they are unable to board. When arriving back at the AIRBNB they had just checked out of, Neil begins searching his phone for any clues to what had gone on the night before, where they could have left their stuff, or what could have happened. He comes across a 2.5 + hour long video that the couple had recorded on the mystery night in question. As they watch it, they witness what looks to be, the total IMPOSSIBLE. Now they NEED answers, and they NEED to get home! They spend the rest of the movie searching the Thai Island for hints, clues, and or answers to what had happened the night before. It isn’t very pretty.

    Now, this movie was for sure interesting, it kept my interest for most of the time, but also, it confused the heck out of me more than a handful of times! I kept thinking it was about to end, I sat here saying..



    out loud, yes

    HAH! I kept checking the timing to be sure, only to see there was still X amount of time left. So I continued watching, waiting for the all knowing part to come. The part where everything is laid out right there and it suddenly all comes together, and it all makes sense! Well, yeah, that never really happened. It did, sort of, like, it did start to explain things, the way it was, why it was happening, little bits and pieces of information… but then something came out of left field! I was thrown waaaaay off course, and back to square 1 basically haha! The ending didn’t really give me the answers I was hoping for, but hey… it’s a movie? It really isn’t bad, its a decent watch, I guess it just depends on you. So if you haven’t seen it yet, go check out ” Death Of Me” On Netflix and let me know your thoughts!!

    • Did the ending answer your questions?
    • Did you think it was as Gory as ” The Cell” ?
    • What are you the most confused about?
    • What do you know now that you didn’t even think of?

    Stuff like that! Oh, here is a cool little bit of FYI- The couple ends up telling us that they are from Boston, Massachusetts, which I think is pretty awesome, andddd the entire movie was filmed in Thailand.. so very beautiful, and oh So cool!

    Can't Cope, Won't Cope (TV Series 2016–2018) - IMDb

    Cant Cope Wont Cope ( 2 seasons, 12 episodes total)

    Can’t Cope, Won’t Cope is an Irish comedy-drama television series, about 2 twenty-something year old friends, Danielle, and Aisling, from Mallow, County Cork, who share a house in Dublin. Aisling is a fund manager, Danielle is an art student who is trying to find her calling. Both women are complete party animals, who love to dance, day and night drink and just have a good time! The series shows a glimpse of what the life of a real twenty-something, might be like, especially for those of us who had not yet matured, or ever had to face any type of consequences, or adversary in our lives. It is real, it is raw, it is good, and it is over :[. The writer of the series announced in August of 2018 that there would not be a season 3, as she had not even expected or planned for the show to go beyond 1 season. That’s too bad because it was definitely a fantastically written, wonderfully produced, and amazingly cast series.

    After doing a little bit of research on the show, it didn’t take long for me to learn that the 33 year old actress who played Danielle, Danika Nika McGuigan , had passed away in July 2019, after a short battle with cancer. Awful. Heart Breaking. So young, such talent. :'[

    Although there are only 12 episodes in the series entirety, I strongly recommend heading over to Netflix and watching it. Hey, 12 episodes? That should be easy, gives all the more reason to Binge watch it now! :]

    Let me know what you think! :]


    Mary, Do You Wanna?

    Lets talk that.

    Photo by Julia Sakelli on Pexels.com

    Is it okay for moms to enjoy this?

    What about dads?

    Do you believe all people alike should be allowed to participate in this legally?

    Is it Legal where your from?


    I think, edibles, oils, tinctures, things like that, are absolutely incredible. Depending on person, dosage, reason [and or timing?]

    What about hassshhhhishh? lol I’ll never forget about this time on Valentines day when I was in high school, my family was gone for the weekend so my older boyfriend [who i ended up being with for 7.5 years], my best friend, and her boyfriend , had accessed ourselves a large, what looked like frozen brownie/old wrapped up brick , of hash from a freezer.

    Yup. Was great.

    We had no idea what to do with it because, I believe I was about 15?! ahhh 15-17, would’ve stayed if I could. :[

    How about the fact that there FACT was no “hey siri” or anything fast like that! No. I had a *beep beep*, aka a friggin Bumble Bee aka indestructible yellow bomb!! Haha … aka a Nextel.

    Which, fact was way cooler than these Iphones. I mean… yeah facetime is great and all, but I LOVED beep beeping ( two- waying) People. Always had to have the best one too as I got older, it’s so funny to think about.

    Yeah, so once we figured out the best use of this at the time, we made Hash Brownies. For our Valentines Day Desert. It was great.

    They tasted BOMB. My house smelt SO GOOD!!

    Ahhh, the days. What do ya’ll think?

    Photo by Washarapol D BinYo Jundang on Pexels.com


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