sleeplessness

It’s been a long day –
As a mom, I need to stay up,
As a human, I need to go to sleep,
I didn’t sleep last night,; I took three 2 minute long blinks… they both ended in a violent jolt- or a tiny twitch… I kept waking myself up. I desperately wanted sleep- but I couldn’t just lay there and close my eyes. There’s to much to do….


why does that happen at least 1 night a week??

Sometimes there are no long blinks at all…. Just sleeplessnesses,

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Being you..

Just getting up to pee, laying back down…. Waiting to hear the quiet footsteps of my tiny toddler.

Just laying.. hearing creaks, cracks, scratches & taps. I get up to smoke, but before I actually do it, I imagine myself doing it a dozen times or so.

I’m wasting time.

I recognize the pitter pattering of tiny feet as they slowly run across the carpeted floor to the staircase.

I don’t hear a sound for a moment, I look to my doorway and see the shadowy figure getting closer- and into my bed climbs my beautiful baby, for cuddles from mama.

Into my bed she climbs, and without a word gets under the blankets, and backs herself into my arms.

As a human, I should probably sleep,

Published by The Truth Mommy Blog

Hey there! Welcome to The Truth, Love Mommy :] I'm Tmom- an entrepreneurial, mom of 4 , balancing life as a Mom, as a Human, my cleaning business, as well as my recovery & addictions. I'm here for fun; to learn, grow & most importantly, to tell the Truth; [the whole truth & nothing but the truth]. I've been told by many people that I need to start a blog, write a book, or even just a journal, that could one day be published. Throughout COVID, I began really questioning my place, my purpose, in this crazy chaotic World. I'd been a SAHM for close to 10 years, and really lost myself in it. (Which IS Okay) I began making things, creating things; like, personalized Tshirts, cups, tumblrs, decals, etc. in hopes to create a small business out of it. I even gave it a snazzy name, "For Cups Sakes". ( ahh yes Spoonerisms) It wasn't a very quick start up, therefore I turned to blogging / journaling. I want to show people real life stuff. I want to tell daily events in my eyes. I want more perspective, and interaction. I want to know my people, people with like interests and similar stories to share. So Lets hang out, chat, advise, and just "vibe" ;]. Lets share our stories and grow together. Let's be real, like, really real, not just for FB real. Help me on my Journey to Creating a Legacy that's worth Leaving.

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