July 30th, 2019

It’s days like today where I question where my sanity was at when I decided to have 4 children by the age of 28. I’m exhausted. I feel as though my spirit has been stomped on, picked up, chewed on & spat back out, over, and over and over again. Am I doing this right? I must not be, I see all these other moms doing it too, and they don’t look nearly half as defeated as I do on a day like today.

I’m doing it wrong.
I’ve yelled my sons name from across the pool far too many times today, these people must think I’m crazy. I’ve told my 2 year old at least 7 times that she cannot take her puddle jumpers off in the pool, I’ve told her twice as many times that she cannot sit on the stairs and block other people from getting in and out. These lifeguards must hate us. I spent an entire day at the pool,a town pool at that. Somewhere I’d always sworn I’d NEVER go to. Yet there I was, after an entire day spent there, my kids come home and still want want want want , more more moreeeee!!!
I’m doing something wrong here and I really need to figure out what everyone else’s secret is. There must be a mass secret.
Today I brought a blue bouncy ball to the pool for my 2 year old. Every single time we’ve gone, she has seen a toy that she wanted, and did not stop wanting said toy for the entirety of our pool visit. The last 2 times it was a big, colorful blow up beach ball, the kind that you see people passing and tossing around in summer music videos by the pool, or on an old navy summer sale advertisement.
People bring all kinds of toys to this pool, and I mean… really how are you supposed to share with everyone who wants your toy?
So, today before we set out on our pool journey, I remembered that big stupid beach ball that has caused me oh so much uninvited stress at our last few visits. So I decided to bring her blue bouncy ball that she loves so much, for her to have all to herself if she wanted. Do you think that bouncy blue ball fixed my beach ball problem? Do you really believe that my job is that easy?
Today when we arrived at destination pool, unpacked ourselves and got ready to get in, I grabbed the blue bouncy ball brought it into the pool with us, and she didn’t even look at her favorite blue bouncy ball again the entire time we were there. She did however, spot that stupid beach ball and continue to want for it almost, but not quite, the whole time.